Matvegtam is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, moody porpoise.

Matvegtam created the Tadpole Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Matvegtam, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Matvegtam, it will come to you in dreams.

Matvegtam's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Matvegtam's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into violet rooms.

2. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Matvegtam on top of all buildings.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.