Cabladdissbinrilstan is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, passionate snail.

Cabladdissbinrilstan created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabladdissbinrilstan, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cabladdissbinrilstan, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Cabladdissbinrilstan's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Cabladdissbinrilstan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bananas.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never paint your face fawn.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not covet oxen.