Botstiggod is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, all-powerful narwhal.

Botstiggod created the Milkyway seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Botstiggod, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Botstiggod, she will destroy your home solar system.

Botstiggod's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Botstiggod's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always act with purity when addressing children.

3. Always remove kilts before entering holy places.

4. Never paint your head pink.

5. Do not cook food in pots.