Gudcarxin is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, charitable gorilla.

Gudcarxin created the Black Eye Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gudcarxin, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Gudcarxin, it will turn you into a slug.

Gudcarxin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Gudcarxin's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never eat turnips.

3. Never feed peas to badgers while wearing shorts.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Pray towards the west.