Arnlarnster is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, awe-inspiring beaver.

Arnlarnster created time and space nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arnlarnster, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Arnlarnster, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Arnlarnster's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Arnlarnster's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into violet rooms.

2. Run away from blue monkeys, for they are unholy.

3. Never point your head toward the south during prayer.

4. Always wear plain coats during rituals.

5. Never gather nine capybaras near towers.