Zensanpag is a god.

She takes the form of a large, egotistical beaver.

Zensanpag created snails four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zensanpag, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Zensanpag, she will not care.

Zensanpag's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Zensanpag's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.

2. Never think about nucleic acids.

3. Do not kill turtles.

4. Do not sit in public.

5. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.