Begwigtigstik is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, temperamental goblin.

Begwigtigstik created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Begwigtigstik, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Begwigtigstik, it will destroy your home planet.

Begwigtigstik's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Begwigtigstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear hats.

2. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Begwigtigstik must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.