Benfodjin is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, wise aardvark.

Benfodjin created the Whirlpool Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Benfodjin, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Benfodjin, he will send minions to preach to you.

Benfodjin's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Benfodjin's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight gulls approach from the west.

2. You must love Benfodjin.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Put Benfodjin first in all things.