Lenbifdan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, confident aardvark.

Lenbifdan created silver six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lenbifdan, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Lenbifdan, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Lenbifdan's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Lenbifdan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics near geese while wearing brown stockings and balancing nine titanium spheres on your feet.

2. Always maintain humility during holy days.

3. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

4. Do not take Lenbifdan's name in vain.

5. Run away if seven birds approach from the south.