Stigquarthundob is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, humorless scorpion.

Stigquarthundob created a Higgs boson six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stigquarthundob, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Stigquarthundob, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Stigquarthundob's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Stigquarthundob's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silver sculpture of Stigquarthundob on top of all buildings.

2. Do not eat parsnips.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.