Kinhenzogyiksidruljig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, cheerful shark.

Kinhenzogyiksidruljig created the planet Saturn three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kinhenzogyiksidruljig, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kinhenzogyiksidruljig, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Kinhenzogyiksidruljig's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Kinhenzogyiksidruljig's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about gravity near tortoises while wearing fawn shoes and balancing eight gold spheres on your arms.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Feed all hungry dogs.