Watlimcem Popqueegceb is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, stupid horse.

Watlimcem Popqueegceb created viruses six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Watlimcem Popqueegceb, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Watlimcem Popqueegceb, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Watlimcem Popqueegceb's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Watlimcem Popqueegceb's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never go into orange rooms.

3. Never talk about optics near ducks while wearing purple kilts.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.