Afvadtarp is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, self-assured rhinoceros.

Afvadtarp created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Afvadtarp, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Afvadtarp, he will turn you into a duck.

Afvadtarp's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Afvadtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not take Afvadtarp's name in vain.

4. You must love Afvadtarp.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.