Kapzigsaw is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, grumpy zebra.

Kapzigsaw created tapeworms seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kapzigsaw, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kapzigsaw, she will ignore you.

Kapzigsaw's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Kapzigsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear fawn.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Kapzigsaw loves ducks, so they must be respected.

5. Always help ants.