Dotlinnullgep is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, idiotic goose.

Dotlinnullgep created the universe five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dotlinnullgep, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dotlinnullgep, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Dotlinnullgep's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Dotlinnullgep's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large gold sculpture of Dotlinnullgep on top of all buildings.

2. Do not dye your hair fawn.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near monkeys while wearing yellow ear rings and balancing five nickel spheres on your chest.

4. Eagles are not to be trusted.

5. Always look after injured rats.