Gedcipstermidstan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, merciful bird.

Gedcipstermidstan created light six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gedcipstermidstan, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gedcipstermidstan, it will laugh at you.

Gedcipstermidstan's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Gedcipstermidstan's Holy Commandments

1. Heed all visions.

2. Remain standing during prayer.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching titanium.

4. Never wear cyan kilts on sacred days.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.