Doncabjonmon is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, ill-tempered horse.

Doncabjonmon created a Higgs boson eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Doncabjonmon, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Doncabjonmon, she will not care at all.

Doncabjonmon's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Doncabjonmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a room before entering it.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always stare at clouds.