Tigkamarf is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, two-faced ferret.

Tigkamarf created the Large Magellanic Cloud four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tigkamarf, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tigkamarf, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Tigkamarf's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Tigkamarf's Holy Commandments

1. Put Tigkamarf first in all things.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity near tortoises while wearing yellow shirts and balancing five platinum spheres on your hands.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Run away if eight ants approach from the south.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.