Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unsympathetic dugong.

Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Erect a large gold sculpture of Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag on top of all buildings.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yokbapgeb Tigjabdag.