Giddinhen is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, witless ferret.

Giddinhen created viruses five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Giddinhen, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Giddinhen, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Giddinhen's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Giddinhen's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Erect seven nickel sculptures of Giddinhen on top of important buildings.

3. Retreat if six monkeys approach from the east.

4. Always wear plain rings during rituals.

5. Always help ducks in need.