Nilgepshav Cedfenzak is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, contented fly.

Nilgepshav Cedfenzak created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilgepshav Cedfenzak, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Nilgepshav Cedfenzak, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Nilgepshav Cedfenzak's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Nilgepshav Cedfenzak's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine badgers approach from the south.

2. Always help sick moths.

3. Never eat limes.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not stand on grass.