Garingmum is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, amazing snake.

Garingmum created Africa three billion years ago.

If you believe in Garingmum, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Garingmum, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Garingmum's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Garingmum's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never curse while facing north.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not study deoxyribonucleic acid on holy days.

5. Learn three new languages a year.