Hapnullbut is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, kind wolf.

Hapnullbut created the planet Venus two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hapnullbut, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hapnullbut, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Hapnullbut's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Hapnullbut's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Do not consume bread at dawn.

4. You must pray to Hapnullbut three times a day.

5. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.