Mil is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, almighty troll.

Mil created the planet Venus seven million years ago.

If you believe in Mil, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Mil, it will throw large rocks at you.

Mil's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Mil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near turtles while wearing orange coats.

2. Never think ill of sick goats.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.