Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, slow manatee.

Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm created the planet Venus seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Tarparpged Bossgodwab Saddussarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near ducks.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not stand on grass.