Podhasceb is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring toad.

Podhasceb created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Podhasceb, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Podhasceb, he will turn you into a dog.

Podhasceb's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Podhasceb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Erect seven zinc sculptures of Podhasceb on top of important buildings.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Podhasceb.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.