Fliggesshom Xembusbem is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-assured zebra.

Fliggesshom Xembusbem created an up quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fliggesshom Xembusbem, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fliggesshom Xembusbem, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Fliggesshom Xembusbem's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Fliggesshom Xembusbem's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Fliggesshom Xembusbem.

2. Do not sprint in public.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never feed cucumbers to nematodes while wearing shirts.

5. You must never eat grapes.