Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, all-knowing dryad.

Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig created time and space nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Ruttvagyakbogvilnabladcum Kopwodlig's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.