Danbonort is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, grumpy scorpion.

Danbonort created water nine million years ago.

If you believe in Danbonort, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Danbonort, she will refuse to believe in you.

Danbonort's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Danbonort's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about great tits.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never eat figs.

5. Never think about archaea.