Zigbasscan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, ruthless slug.

Zigbasscan created the Sombrero Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Zigbasscan, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Zigbasscan, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Zigbasscan's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Zigbasscan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never hurt manatees.

5. You must pray to Zigbasscan six times a day.