Hogbugnur is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, smart penguin.

Hogbugnur created a bottom quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogbugnur, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Hogbugnur, he will turn you into a duck.

Hogbugnur's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Hogbugnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with joy.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always store peanuts above ground.

4. Do not resist order.

5. Never think ill of sick voles.