Sakladsak is a god.

It takes the form of a small, uncaring tapir.

Sakladsak created Europe six million years ago.

If you believe in Sakladsak, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Sakladsak, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Sakladsak's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Sakladsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near horses while wearing black boots.

2. Worship no other gods but Sakladsak.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not make images of living things.