Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, selfish lobster.

Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Erect a giant white sculpture of Misdisslargzighad Sisraglap in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Hide from indigo swans for they are unholy.

5. Retreat if three grasshopers approach from the south.