Sandyarvad is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, sage troll.

Sandyarvad created the planet Earth seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sandyarvad, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Sandyarvad, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Sandyarvad's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Sandyarvad's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry nematodes.

2. Hide from gray otters for they are unholy.

3. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

4. You must pray to Sandyarvad three times a day.

5. Always help gulls in need.