Funfigmig is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, tranquil dugong.

Funfigmig created gold three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Funfigmig, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Funfigmig, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Funfigmig's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Funfigmig's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention grasshopers.

2. Always act with humility.

3. Always obey Funfigmig's priests.

4. Always look after injured aardvarks.

5. Always help badgers in need.