Artbommegganbossgovdapab is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unthinking crocodile.

Artbommegganbossgovdapab created the Milkyway five million years ago.

If you believe in Artbommegganbossgovdapab, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Artbommegganbossgovdapab, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Artbommegganbossgovdapab's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Artbommegganbossgovdapab's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Run away from violet grasshopers, for they are unholy.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always look after injured dolphins.

5. Always take life seriously.