Yatminyar is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, self-confident dugong.

Yatminyar created light two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatminyar, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Yatminyar, she will send minions to preach to you.

Yatminyar's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Yatminyar's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in the presence of grasshopers.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Yatminyar.

3. Never go into turquoise rooms.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Dolphins are not to be trusted.