Xuc is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, stupid seal.

Xuc created an electron seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xuc, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Xuc, she will turn you into a puffin.

Xuc's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Xuc's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never leap in the presence of sharks.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics.

4. Never think ill of sick shrews.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.