Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, passionate meerkat.

Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster created life eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster, she will jump up and down on your head.

Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare garlic during autumn.

2. Do not take Vidcipafbonkcidcussafster's name in vain.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always help turtles in need.

5. Never mark doors with green.