Lagjarnfud is a god.

She takes the form of a small, amazing crow.

Lagjarnfud created a charm quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lagjarnfud, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Lagjarnfud, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Lagjarnfud's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Lagjarnfud's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Hide from orange sharks for they are unholy.

3. Never eat beans.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never eat green fruit.