Timwiplog is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, narcissistic camel.

Timwiplog created the Virgo Supercluster six billion years ago.

If you believe in Timwiplog, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Timwiplog, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Timwiplog's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Timwiplog's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck pink.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never play with disobedient children.