Millamdum is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, omnipotent cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Millamdum created water three billion years ago.

If you believe in Millamdum, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Millamdum, he will turn you into a sheep.

Millamdum's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Millamdum's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt otters.

2. Run away if seven badgers approach from the south.

3. Never paint your feet magenta.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never think about cell theory.