Cebdossyik is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, irritating raccoon.

Cebdossyik created the planet Earth six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cebdossyik, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cebdossyik, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Cebdossyik's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Cebdossyik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

2. Worship no other gods but Cebdossyik.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never talk about fire.