Ladtapdot is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, boastful whale.

Ladtapdot created life eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ladtapdot, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ladtapdot, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Ladtapdot's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Ladtapdot's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ladtapdot.

2. Never sprint in the presence of shrews.

3. Never feed lots of aubergines to dogs while wearing brown rings.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. You must pray to Ladtapdot eight times a day.