Kablenken Cargudhubort is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, unjust hydra.

Kablenken Cargudhubort created everything that exists four million years ago.

If you believe in Kablenken Cargudhubort, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Kablenken Cargudhubort, she will turn you into a rat.

Kablenken Cargudhubort's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Kablenken Cargudhubort's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.