Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, humorless human.

Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak created oxygen four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak, he will curse you with boils.

Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Tityatwat Limgatwitlapkamyak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help monkeys in need.

2. Always act with obedience.

3. Hide from yellow mites for they are unholy.

4. Never go into blue rooms.

5. Always act with purity when addressing children.