Stafvonk is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, thoughtless goose.

Stafvonk created everything that exists six million years ago.

If you believe in Stafvonk, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Stafvonk, she will come to you in dreams.

Stafvonk's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Stafvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Stafvonk.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never mix gooseberries with oil.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.