Cenortquag is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, ill-tempered duck.

Cenortquag created a photon five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cenortquag, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cenortquag, she will laugh at you.

Cenortquag's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Cenortquag's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

2. Cenortquag must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

4. Always help whales.

5. Never wear boots.