Sogditjip is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, ill-tempered turtle.

Sogditjip created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sogditjip, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sogditjip, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sogditjip's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Sogditjip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Retreat if four horses approach from the west.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.