Cippomhen is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, unthinking swallow.

Cippomhen created a down quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cippomhen, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cippomhen, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Cippomhen's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Cippomhen's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to badgers while wearing mauve kilts.

2. Never laugh in the presence of snails.

3. Do not travel during spring.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Do not listen to music.